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I had a long chat with my teenage son last night about his future. He’s about to choose his options and has decided he wants to become a professional YouTuber.
We talked about lots of things and he understands fully that he’s likely to come up against some people who don’t think this could be a real career path…(blah, blah, blah).
Anyway, I wanted to share one thing that I said to him and it’s something I say to my coaching clients when they’re talking to me about their goals.
Make sure you’ve got your roadmap in the right direction!
So how will you know? That’s easy.
Ask these two questions.
- Will I enjoy the journey?
- Will I enjoy the destination?
If you answer no to either of these then you’re probably not going in the right direction.
If you answered yes, keep going. The journey may not always go exactly as you expected, you may hit upon some road blocks along the way. But as long as you can keep answering yes, you’re on the right track.
Presley Swagarty, author of Be, Do and Have more say “Goals are the roadmap to success” and I absolutely agree. He goes onto say that we wouldn’t set out on a journey without knowing the destination and that’s true, well at least it it for most people.
What if you’ve been working towards a goal for a long time and you realize your roadmap is facing the wrong direction?
A lady I was coaching some time back had this realization and this is what she said to me when she realized that she didn’t enjoy the journey and she didn’t even want to get to the destination she’d set.
“But I’ve been working towards this goal for so many years now, I’ll be a failure if I give up now!”
Now you may be reading this and thinking well that sounds crazy but I can assure you this lady was not alone in these kinds of feelings. I hear this kind of thing time and time again.
We seem to have an inbuilt fear of failure. I’ve got it and to a certain degree it’s powerful, we can use that fear to push us forward, but what happens when we do get that realization that the goal we’ve been working on is not what we want anymore?
Certainly what happened to me was I found I’d given up on all my goals and the goals I was working on were someone else’s and I was trying to want the end destination but I didn’t. I wanted a whole new direction. Thankfully for me, I got that new direction. I know now how to make sure my goals are my own and that I keep my road map the right way up, moving me in the direction of the goals I really want to achieve.
Let’s do a little reframing ~ Reframing is when you mentally put a different frame around what is going on.
I’ll be a failure because I’ve been working on this goal for so long (now remember we’re talking about a goal that you’ve now worked out get’s a no to these 2 questions ~ Will I enjoy the journey? and will I enjoy the destination when I get there?)
Here comes the reframe….
I’m smart because I’ve spotted that I’m on the wrong path and now I get to change direction and head in the direction of the destination I want.
There’s almost always a positive reframe that you can put on any negative situation, play around with this idea in your own life.
So now you’ve got your roadmap pointing in the right direction, you know where you’re going (that’s your measurable goal), you’ve said YES, you’ll enjoy the destination and you’re all set to enjoy the journey even if it’s a bumpy ride.
Now before you head off, with your roadmap let me give you a few survival tips
1. What happens if I hit a road block?
I can pretty much guarantee this will happen at some point, maybe not with the goal you’re working on now but at some time, so here’s what to do. You have two options
Option 1: You can find a different route ~ it happens sometimes, we’re you just have to try something different. If what you’re doing isn’t working, try something different. Sometimes a little tweaking makes a big difference.
Or you can remove the block ~ this is always necessary when it’s an emotional block. If it’s an emotional block and you don’t clear it then it will travel with your wherever you go.
How to remove emotional blocks
We block ourselves in so many ways and these usually come down to negative or limiting emotions or negative beliefs what we’ve formed throughout our lives. EFT (Emotional Freedom techniques) often called tapping is a powerful technique that works with the energy in the body and in my opinion, it’s the best way to release these blocks.
For a demonstration of how to use EFT watch this short EFT video explaining the tapping points and how this is effective.
You can effectively use EFT on your own by learning the tapping points. If you find that you’re not getting results consult with myself or an EFT practitioner near you.
2 .What happens if I go off course?
The chances are you will go off course at some stage, maybe a few times and it’s okay, I think we all do it. I know I certainly do. I recommend that you have your goals written down and keep those goals in a folder. Review these goals regularly. I have mine on my desk with me every work day and I’ll often take them to read in the evening or even with me in the car if I know I’m going to have a wait. The reason I do this and recommend you do it too is that you’ll quickly spot if you’re getting side-tracked and going off course. You’re also focusing on your goals whenever you review them ~ The law of attraction states that whatever we focus in we attract into our life. It’s a no brainier for me, write your goals down and focus on them.
If that happens, read through this post again, pin it to your Pinterest board so that you can always refer back to it. This happens and again it’s okay. At the beginning of every year, I review my long term, what I call my life goals. Because I can tell you 100% hand on my heart, the life goals I had when I was 16, 21, 30 are not the same as they are now. Some are but many got crossed off along the way and new ones got added. We are changing all the time. As we grow in ourselves and experience new things our goals will change and that’s completely natural.
Nothing is set in stone. They’re your goals to do with what you want.
I create and recommend you do the same, new goals for each year and then at least once a month I read through all of my goals for the year and check in with myself as to whether I still want to work on and achieve those goals. I then create my goals for that month based on these long term goals.
At the end of the day, your goals are just that. YOUR goals. So you can choose when to work on them and when to let them go.
If you seriously want to achieve your goals ~ Focus on them. Write them down and keep asking yourself “What can I do now to move me closer to achieving my goal of…?
Get your answer and do it!
Do you write your goals down? Let me know in the comments below.